Top Ten Socialist Programs The Anti-Socialism Nuts Use

uncle-samEverywhere you look these days there are hoards of teabaggers, 9/12ers, and other uncategorized crazies crying about how socialist the pending health care reform is. These people just love hanging off the nuts of the Glenn Becks and Rush Limbaughs of the right-wing. What they are unaware of, however, is how truly socialist this otherwise capitalistic country already is and how truly dependent they are on that socialism. As such, I’ve compiled what I consider to be the top ten socialist programs run by the United States government that every citizen takes for granted, including the anti-socialist nuts holding signs and protesting.

  1. Public Education
    You, your children, you family, or someone you know has participated in this socialist institution. Not surprisingly, the ancestors of the same nuts crying foul today were doing the same thing when government-funded school were first proposed.
  2. Police, Fire, and Emergency Services
    Next time you get robbed, your house is on fire, or you need other emergency services, be sure to turn them away because you hate socialism.
  3. The US Postal Service
    It’s pretty nice to be able to send and receive mail every day (except Sunday) wherever you are in the country. “Neither snow nor rain nor heat nor gloom of night stays these couriers from the swift completion of their appointed rounds.”
  4. Medicare, Medicaid
    My absolute favorite of the right-wing protesters are the ones who don’t want socialized medicine, but insist that the government not interfere with their Medicare and/or Medicaid. Ignorance is just too gentle of a word.
  5. Public Subways, Metro Systems, Buses, and Light Rails
    Millions of people in our nations cities use these socialist methods of transportation to get to work, go shopping, or just get around town.
  6. Sidewalks, Roads, & Highways
    Sure, not every street in the country is in the best condition, but they wouldn’t even be paved at all if the government didn’t provide them as a service to all of its people.
  7. Public Parks, Beaches, and Zoos
    Who doesn’t enjoy a stroll in the park, relaxing on the beach, or seeing monkeys fling poo at the zoo? No one, that’s who. If it weren’t a national park protected and funded by the government, the Grand Canyon would probably already be the Grand Landfill.
  8. Public Museums, Public Libraries
    These fun and educational institutions are a vital part to any decent city. Their enjoyment can be shared by everyone because of their “socialist” government funding.
  9. S-CHIP and other state-run insurance programs
    I’m not sure how, but the Glen Becks and Rush Limbaughs of the world have managed to convince their listeners that health insurance for children is a bad thing.
  10. Social Security
    I’m skeptical that I’ll ever see a dime of the money that gets taken out of my pay check to pay the social security of others, but this New Deal program was a vital part of recovery from the great depression. It’s even got “social” right in the title!

There you have it! Are there even more socialist government programs that hugely benefit the country? You bet. Know what that I didn’t list but you feel belongs on there? Feel free to leave a comment.

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